“A woman who is flat-chested is very hard to be a 10” — Donald Trump
In ninth grade, a bunch of boys used to grab my tits, as a kind of a joke I guess. They told me I couldn’t be mad, that it wasn’t really wrong because I didn’t have any “real tits.” I told our vice principal and everyone in my grade was mad at me because I couldn’t just take a joke.
In 11th grade, one of my classmates asked me why, if I was Puerto Rican, I was so flat-chested.
In 12th grade, my boyfriend told me I should get a boob job.
Sophomore year of college, I started seriously considering getting a breast augmentation. I knew exactIy what I wanted. A tear drop shaped implant, 200 CCs of saline, inserted through the belly button, the way they were on “Dr 90210,” to reduce visibility of scarring, fat injections to hide muscle hardening, to create a more natural look. Instead of surgery, I took a series of pills that I had purchased over the internet (for $300), intended to gradually increase your bust size. They made me throw up constantly but I took them for about two months until I couldn’t take it anymore.
I’ve always had a complicated relationship with my body. My body has always felt more like something that I carry with me and maintain for the amusement of others. I’ve often felt detached from it because of the ways in which people (mostly men) have criticized it, made fun of it, and taken advantage of it. I have at times forgotten that I am not just a body, that I am a person first and foremost. It’s taken me a really long time to stop comparing myself to others, to stop myself from rating myself, to stop praying that I’m attractive enough for men that I don’t even know or care about, to remember that I’m a fucking person.
Its taken me a really long time to be okay with the body I have, and I wont go back to hating it because a hateful, racist, homophobic creep says its not good enough.
We currently have someone running for president that views women solely as bodies. Bodies that he considers to be inconvenient and useless, unless presented to him for his own amusement, unless he decides to use them as he wishes. Bodies whose rights he wants to take away. But, it’s not just female bodies’ rights that he wants to take away, it’s black, brown, queer, Muslim, Jewish, Mexican and immigrant bodies’ rights, too.
But we aren’t just bodies, we’re people all of us. I don’t know about you, but I won’t go back to being reduced to a body. It’s taken me a really long time to be okay with the body I have, and I won’t go back to hating it because a hateful, racist, homophobic creep says it’s not good enough. I’m a person. I’m a person that loves comedy, and art, and my friends, and the family of strong women who raised me, and hot dogs, and regular dogs, and singing in the shower when I know no one is home.
Why go back to being seen as something unimportant? Why go back to being reduced to just a body?
I’m very pleased to have just voted for Hillary Clinton, who I feel will stick up for a multitude of people, rather than try to put down and oppress “bodies.”